Liking a girl whose working in pub?

[kenneth38]

Bro Advanced, in any r/s or even potential r/s, you should try and hold on to the power. i.e. she needs you more than you need her. Otherwise, it's really mental torture. In another perspective, it's all about whether you want to take her down, or you walk away.

Be confident in yourself, @ 25, you have all the capital in the world, youth, energy, time and some money too. Miss Bartender, is no match to your charms, if you so decide to turn it on. Confidence does not equal needy. You don't need her. She needs you.

Keep positive thoughts in your head, stop contacting her, but initiate once in a while just to test water. Definitely not every day. Once a week, yes maybe. Busy yourselves with other targets/other pubs. If you find your thoughts returning to her, remind yourself again that you are in control of your thoughts. We cannot control other people, but we certainly can try and control ourselves, and our response. It's key to stay positive, as these internal thoughts will manifest in your decisions, thought processes, behaviors. Over time, the positive thoughts, translate into an aura of presence and confidence, that not only ladies are attracted to, but guys as well. Self-deprecating humor (i.e. laughing it yourself) is a simple beginning to your own self-confidence.

Hanging yourself on a tree, when there's a forest, seems a waste. Cultivate the bountiful mentality. Your life is ahead of you, she may not be the right lady anyway. Anyone can share secrets, and some secrets are not even real. It's OK to take it easy, and definitely good not to take it too seriously, at least in this beginning phase.

Word of caution though, when you come out and am prepared to put your heart into a r/s, you knowingly enter a risky area, where your heart may not come out unscathed. Put it another way, if your intention is to chew, and spit out the bones, and you do it, you are protected. But when you pour your heart/soul into the r/s/lady, be prepared to come out battle-scarred, but stronger, and even gaining a new understanding about yourself, how much pain you can endure and survive. When you go up the mountain forest often enough, sooner or later, you will meet your tigress. Rise to the occasion, either you ride her, you get mauled, or you are equals and really get married. In all cases, this is LIVING. It's life, with it's unbelievable highs and f*cking unbearable pain.

Yep, I used to have a g/f who worked in a pub, lasted about a year. It was a hell of a ride, and I'm still picking up the pieces. That's how I started reading your thread. Be careful of what you wish for !

Good luck my friend.

[lagonda]

Originally Posted by kenneth38

Bro Advanced, in any r/s or even potential r/s, you should try and hold on to the power. i.e. she needs you more than you need her. Otherwise, it's really mental torture. In another perspective, it's all about whether you want to take her down, or you walk away.

Be confident in yourself, @ 25, you have all the capital in the world, youth, energy, time and some money too. Miss Bartender, is no match to your charms, if you so decide to turn it on. Confidence does not equal needy. You don't need her. She needs you.

Keep positive thoughts in your head, stop contacting her, but initiate once in a while just to test water. Definitely not every day. Once a week, yes maybe. Busy yourselves with other targets/other pubs. If you find your thoughts returning to her, remind yourself again that you are in control of your thoughts. We cannot control other people, but we certainly can try and control ourselves, and our response. It's key to stay positive, as these internal thoughts will manifest in your decisions, thought processes, behaviors. Over time, the positive thoughts, translate into an aura of presence and confidence, that not only ladies are attracted to, but guys as well. Self-deprecating humor (i.e. laughing it yourself) is a simple beginning to your own self-confidence.

Hanging yourself on a tree, when there's a forest, seems a waste. Cultivate the bountiful mentality. Your life is ahead of you, she may not be the right lady anyway. Anyone can share secrets, and some secrets are not even real. It's OK to take it easy, and definitely good not to take it too seriously, at least in this beginning phase.

Word of caution though, when you come out and am prepared to put your heart into a r/s, you knowingly enter a risky area, where your heart may not come out unscathed. Put it another way, if your intention is to chew, and spit out the bones, and you do it, you are protected. But when you pour your heart/soul into the r/s/lady, be prepared to come out battle-scarred, but stronger, and even gaining a new understanding about yourself, how much pain you can endure and survive. When you go up the mountain forest often enough, sooner or later, you will meet your tigress. Rise to the occasion, either you ride her, you get mauled, or you are equals and really get married. In all cases, this is LIVING. It's life, with it's unbelievable highs and f*cking unbearable pain.

Yep, I used to have a g/f who worked in a pub, lasted about a year. It was a hell of a ride, and I'm still picking up the pieces. That's how I started reading your thread. Be careful of what you wish for !

Good luck my friend.

There you have it bro,words from the grand master himself.i suppose the key is not to give in too much.

[Advanced]

@ Mr_don_juan & kenneth38 - Well noted, i will try and understand.. also maybe my Shy and don't know how communicate with girls might be due to me being all boys school last time eh? so never really mix around until older.. and also No confidence cause my looks and i fat =(

i haven't been talking/texting to her loh.. work everyday killing me liao, on the other end, she herself also didn't text or call =/

[greatdane88]

Originally Posted by Advanced

@ Mr_don_juan & kenneth38 - Well noted, i will try and understand.. also maybe my Shy and don't know how communicate with girls might be due to me being all boys school last time eh? so never really mix around until older.. and also No confidence cause my looks and i fat =(

i haven't been talking/texting to her loh.. work everyday killing me liao, on the other end, she herself also didn't text or call =/

no need to bother. fat or not fat is nothing. I have friends who are from a single sex school but all damn good with girls.

You should just let it go.

[milfmilf]

Originally Posted by sammyboyfor

Forget about girls for the moment. At your age you should concentrate on your career and your finances.

Once you have lots of $$$$$$, the girls will be falling head of heals in love with you on a regular basis.

lots of $$$ is like what kind of salary or savings/assets?

[Advanced]

Didn't msg her for sometime, and outta sudden she text me back telling me she moved hse etc.. But while texting, she suddenly changed topic and asked me if i know of this "health product" and then asked if i wanna "support" and buy some

[Jamesleejamesle]

Bro Advanced,
Aiyah, if I were interested in u, I will be very paiseh to ask u to support what I am selling on a part time basis. I will wait for YOU to say that u want to support me.
However, if I treat u like any of the customers in the pub, I will ask you to support me. I believe she's treating u like other customers.
If u are a nice guy, support her lah. But seriously, bro, there's many fishes in the sea. There will be many more girls in future for u.
As for being fat, I have seen many good looking girls with fat guys. If u are conscious of it, make some effort to choose what u eat n exercise regularly. Your self confidence will shoot up once u lose a few kg.
Being successful in what u do is also an attraction to girls, so do work well with your colleagues n get a couple of promotion.
U will be surprised. Once one girl start being interested in u, suddenly there are many more attracted to u. So, be prepared.
In the meanwhile, good luck, bro.

[milfmilf]

TS likes the girl doesn't mean the girl must also like back
she also has her friends, her priorities and her targets
don't mistaken acceptance of gift as love ...
all along is only a one sided info ... no need to get story from girl??
cannot? so must give benefit of doubts lah
I always like to give all the respect ... and after showing my interest, should up to her to respond .. 勉强没幸福

[Advanced]

haha..i also wanna exercise and always tell myself too =x, but when wanna start the lazy come liao kns.. some more alone run hor.. like paiseh sia.. ppl look

then now ankle there fracture plus bone crack, sian liao loh..

@Jamesleejamesle - True la.. if really treat as someone you like, won't bother to ask you support. but maybe.. just maybe i'm not that close to her yet ba? lol

[henabi]

Originally Posted by Advanced

Didn't msg her for sometime, and outta sudden she text me back telling me she moved hse etc.. But while texting, she suddenly changed topic and asked me if i know of this "health product" and then asked if i wanna "support" and buy some

treat her just as normal friend...

as for "health product"... no need to support. probably some MLM companies targeting young and naive youngsters to make fast $$$ out of them.

for guys, its always better to focus on our career first. its rather normal for a guy to marry late into our 30s or 40s.
-spend the next 5 yrs to build your career.
-look after yourself. take care of your looks, your hair, your dressing.
-get into shape. i have past injuries to my wrist, my lower back, my hip and my kneecap too. I even had a motorbike accident a few yrs ago but that didn't stop me from working out.
injury is not an excuse to avoid exercise. There are other ways to work out without causing old injuries to open up again.
if you need motivation. join a gym club. working out with others beats running alone.
-enrich yourself. go for financial courses, dining etiquette courses, wine tasting courses etc. attend networking sessions and widen your circle of friends.

once you are successful, you will start to meet girls from different leagues.

[emogirl]

I was a bartender back at a bar in San Diego and we definitely flirt with our customers so that they keep coming back and they tip us other. We enjoy the attention and company but it's mostly a business relationship. It's better to chat with this girl outside of the bar situation. And see how she really feels.