Diary of a modern day courtesan - Page 7

LordVader · #91 06-02-2014, 03:20 PM

I must say this has to be one of the best thread around.

Well done furritales.

furritales · #92 08-02-2014, 01:42 AM

1/4/2011 Remember when... (Part 1)

Malcolm called while I was in the cab

Malcolm: Reach home?

Me: Haha. Still on the PIE. Still a long way to go...You give me more...

Malcolm: What more?

Me: I mean the fee.. You give me more than my original fee. And we did not even finish the role play.

Malcolm: *Chuckle* Oh... Yeah... Halfway through only.. But its ok.. We can always continue another day.

Another day?
I think I wont meet you ever again
You are a bottomless pit

Me: Malcolm, I will call you back when I am home.
Malcolm: Sure. Bye.

I glance out of the window into the dark of the night. Into the dark abyss at the back of my mind.
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I was in his room, on his bed with a book, Sophie's world by Jostein Gaarder on my lap.
But I wasn't reading.
Will he accept it?
He had to
My mind is made
No one can change it
Okay
This is it

Me: Dan... Come here.. I need to talk to you.
Daniel: Ok.. Give me a minute.

A minute turned into 20.

He was doing his powerpoint presentation on neonatal biliary atresia.

Me: Dan...
Daniel: Ok. Done. Whats up baby?

Me: *Taking a deep breath* Dan.. I think we need to have a little break from each other... I feel...

Daniel: What you saying Kerri? What little break?!

Me: *Sigh* Daniel.... lets break up. I really...

Daniel: *Shaking his head* I don't understand... Kerri... What happen?! What did I do wrong?!

I looked away... fixing my gaze on his Lippincott anatomy chart on the wall
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Miss hello?... turn left or right?
Me: Oh uh uncle after traffic light turn left into the carpark..

After my bath I made a call to Malcolm.

Malcolm: Call me back in ten minutes.. Iam on the other line with someone..

Mmm.. I wonder who he is talkin to..
Female?
Male?

Me: Eh, talking to a potential girlfriend ah?
Malcolm: Haha, I was talking to an escort I used to meet..
Me: Oh..
Malcolm: She wanted to borrow money to lend to her boyfriend. Apparently burn his fingers in some shares. I doubt he burn his fingers in shares. More like gambling. Her boyfriend is a hardcore gambler! I told her so many times to leave him!

I felt a twinge of jealousy
She is just an escort
Why are you overly concern about her
Why are getting upset over her
Sigh
So am I
Kerri, you are also just an escort
Don't you ever forget that

Malcolm: Kerri, I know I have no right to say this, but I really hope you are sensible enough not to give away your hard-earned money to your boyfriend.
Me: I don't have a boyfriend. We.. broke up a couple of years back..
Malcolm: Oh ok..
Malcolm: Why did you guys break up?
Me: Because.. there is a clash in our personality.
Malcolm: Huh? If there is a clash then why be together in the first place?
Me: Tsk.. Aiya.. Initially you won't know mah.. Its only when 2 people get really close together... then slowly you know the person true persona.. Wei, you are so much older than me...all these matters of the heart..you should know better than me...

Malcolm: *Laugh* I hasn't been dating for like 5 or 6 years..

Me: Why? Are You fussy? You are so eligible.. You have all the 5Cs..

6C....Plus one more C..
Choking people..

Malcolm: *Laugh* Yeah 5C... You want the truth? Better not, I don't want to offend you..

Me: Say say.. Iam not easily offended..

Malcolm: Ermm.. I think most women just love my money..more than love me..

Me: Mmm.. Sure or not.. Surely you have met someone who truly love you..

Malcolm: My last relationship.. I love her so much.. you know.. we were at the verge of marriage..

Me: Then then???

Maybe you scare her away with your superb choking skills..

Malcolm: I brought her to alot of parties and she got to know a high profile banker.. Very rich.. Richer than me.. For half a year she went out with him while still dating me..

Me: Oh my god.. How you find out?

Malcolm: Their love story and wedding photos was splashed across The Tatler magazine.. Well, its a blessing in disguise.. finally see her true colours.. Good luck to her husband.

Me: Oh.. so you hate women now?..

Malcolm: No.. I don't hate women.. I just don't believe in love anymore..

I envy your ex-girlfriend
I envy her so much
Because she once, had your love..

Me: Is that why you keep engaging escorts?
Malcolm: Err.. What made you say that?

Because you say so..
On our first meeting..
I remember everything you said..

Me: Oh.. I don't know.. I just guess..
Malcolm: Iam a man Kerri.. I have certain needs..
Me: Oh.. needs like choking people?!..

The words were out before I realise it
There was a deafening silence on his end
Damn!
He is angry?
I didnt mean it

Me: Haha.. Just kidding..
Malcolm: Sorry
Me: Why sorry?
Malcolm: I know I play a bit rough

Me: You know.. You scare the shit out of me during.. during our first night..
Malcolm: *Laugh* When I first saw you.. I just.. I don't know how to say it.. Nevermind.. Anyway, enough about me. I want to know about you..
Me: Tsk.. No.. Just say.. When you first saw me what happen?
Malcolm: Erm.. you look very vulnerable.. Fragile.. Yet not fragile..

Me: (Laugh) Oh.. because I seems fragile... u feel a need to protect me is it?
Malcolm: No Kerri.. I don't want to protect you..

My heart just sank..

Me: (Forced laughter) Haha.. ok.. then?
Malcolm: I want to hurt you Kerri..

WHAT!..

Me: I don't understand.. Why you want to hurt me?
Malcolm: I don't understand it anymore than you do.. Its just.. a feeling..
Me: Did you hurt your past girlfriends or escorts as well?
Malcolm: No.. Sex was just normal with them. Even with those escorts, at the most is just some spanking.. There isn't any urge to hurt them or be rough or.. I don't know why.. *Sigh*

Malcolm: *Frustrated* I don't understand.. but when I am with you, I just want to hurt you.. I enjoy seeing you scream.. I don't know why.. Sorry.. I thought you could tell me why..

Me: Huh... why like this..?
Malcolm: I don't know..
Me: *Sigh* Ok malcolm.. I want to sleep now.. It has been a long day..
Malcolm: Sorry.. You alright? Are you going to stop meeting me?
Me: *Silence*
Malcolm: Kerri?
Me: Iam alright. You mention a party next week?
Malcolm: * Excited * Yes! Haha.. Its a.. very interesting party.. Come with me.

Come with me..
Its not a question nor a request
More like a command

Me: Ok. Smart casual?
Malcolm: Err.. Attire dosen't really matter.. Well, smart casual is fine. By the way, just now the roleplay? I must say, you are a natural. Have you done this before? I can't wait to continue the roleplay..
Me: No, I never act before..
Me: Ok! Malcolm..Iam tired.. You let me know the details of the party another day ok?
Malcolm: Alright.. You have a good sleep. Good night Kerri.
Me: Good nite.

I did not lie there
Its the truth
I have never really act in roleplays
I don't need to

Laying on my bed, I just could not go to sleep
Listening to the echos in my mind

I want to hurt you
I enjoy seeing you scream....

I never have to put an act for roleplays
I don't need to
Because its all pure pain and terror
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furritales · #93 10-02-2014, 09:46 PM

1/4/11 Remember when (part 2)

Laying on my bed, I just could not go to sleep
Listening to the echos in my mind

I want to hurt you
I enjoy seeing you scream....

I never have to put an act for roleplays
I don't need to
Because its all pure pain and terror

Chirp chirp..
I look at the incoming SMS on my mobile phone, its Malcolm.

Malcolm: I can't sleep. Chat with me for a while..
Me: Haha... okie

Me: Why cannot sleep?
Malcolm: Tell me why you broke up with your ex boyfriend? I don't believe its just a clash of personality.
Me: Aiyo.. Why are you so kaypoh?

Malcolm: Just want to know more about you.

My heart just skip a beat..

Me: The story is very long, are you sure you want to read?
Malcolm: Nevermind, I can call you now?
Me: No la.. I don't feel like talking anyway.. I just text you.
Malcolm: Ok.

Once a upon a time, a girl fell in love with a boy...

The boy was very well liked by friends and family...reason being he is smart, witty, academically intelligent, filial and possessed an angelic face... coming from a string of cream-of-the-crop schools, his parents placed huge hopes and wishes on him...

But no one knew... no one knew the other side of the coin... they only see one shiny side... only the girl that fell deeply ..deeply in love with him knew... because its only with the girl he loved that he would take off his perfectly sculpted mask.

Everyone envied this couple... the love between them is always so palpable... so sweet and tender that it hurts..

As the days go... their love deepen.. so deep that the girl was allowed into his dark and twisted world.. the girl was aghast yet there was no point of return... she was determined to change him... because she loved him so much..

But the battle against the dark was a uphill task... but she never gave up... the darkness was starting to consume her mentally and physically.. she became increasingly moody and irritable... she threw tantrums and flare up for the slightest reason... she was totally aware of her changes and yet she was helpless...

One day she mustered her courage and ask for a split. The fateful decision was made after many sleepless nights.. the boy would not hear of it. They had a huge fight to an extent friends and family got wind of it...

In the end, the girl decided to give their relationship another chance.

The loving couple got back again and the sun continue to shine the earth never stop turning.... everything was back to the same... or was it?

One day, the girl ask for a split again and she would not hear of any pleas that he pleaded nor the threats he screamed at her... and to make things worse... friends and family pleaded on his behalf.. but she just would refused to bulge. Close friends were nitpicking on her why she wanted to leave such a nice and talented boy... horrid gossips like "she found a better guy" were rampant...

On the 3rd day of the split she received news that he had set a potassium chloride intravenous drip on himself and passed away... leaving behind a poignant letter for her...

The girl was devastated. She had never expected things will take such a horrific turn. But it was too late..

From then on its her against the world... friends and his family blamed her for his death... she lost almost all of her friends... but no one knew her miseries... no one knew she was actually protecting their precious memories of the boy by not revealing how dangerously warped he was.

On the last day of the wake, she turned up to send him off for the last time but was vehemently chased away.

But what made her so forlorn and jaded was not only her beloved sudden departure but the trust and friendship of friends that was so seemingly strong... but shattered at the slight rustle... The accusations were all very vileful.

She shut down her facebook, changed her mobile number and emails. Only her mother and niece stood by her during that darkest period of her life.

Malcolm: Oh my.. Iam so sorry.. I didn't know... I shouldn't have probe.. It must have been painful for you to recall all these..

Me: Its ok Malcolm.. Its so long already.. I have long healed.. What didn't kill me only serve to make me stronger.

Me: Hey, really late already... Lets go to bed ok?

Malcolm: I wish you are in my bed now. Ok.. good night.

Me: Haha... good night Malcolm..

Have i really healed?
It is often said, time will heal all wounds
But still it will leave scars
Just because the scars had healed, doesn't mean the pain has

die.cockstand · #94 11-02-2014, 01:51 AM

Thanks for taking time to share your private diary with us, appreciate your efforts.
It must have taken you quite awhile to come up with something this engaging and intriguing

You're definitely good enough to deserve a book of your own.

My humble pts to show my support and respect for your work.

viviankoh · #95 14-02-2014, 04:01 PM

I can totally relate to how u feel

You are awesome!

sassysunshine · #96 14-02-2014, 04:10 PM

Thanks for the constant updates! It's really a good read.

Keep it going!

curiouslala · #97 17-02-2014, 11:11 PM

you're the super writer here in sbf. oh my..
i came here just to check your story.

hope you keep writing, and if you do publish & sell a book, please do share the link here.
i can't just keep reading bit by bit like this leh.. jin curiousss on what's nexttt..

furritales · #98 07-03-2014, 04:49 PM

1/4/11 Remember when (part 3)

Have i really healed?
It is often said, time will heal all wounds
But still it will leave scars
Just because the scars had healed, doesn't mean the pain has..

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Me: Can we not play those games anymore?
Daniel: Why? I thought you enjoy it too?

I pretend to enjoy it so that you can be happy..

Me: Sometimes it get too painful Daniel...
Daniel: * laugh * Do you know you look so beautiful when you are screaming..
Me: Huh?!! What.....

I never had the chance to complete my sentence. He force his mouth onto mine and push his tongue against mine. A tongue fight which always left me gasping for breath.

Without a word he push me unto the bed and buried his head in my chest. I brought my hands to his head and gently rouse his hair. Pulling him up I tried to kiss him on the mouth but he grab hold of my hair and gently arch my neck upwards.

I moan and turn my head to the side. It feel so good to be nuzzled on the neck.

The neck is the only area he is gentle because he once said there are 2 major blood vessels running down either side of the neck.

Sigh
Why don't all the major vessels run all over my body
Just for once, so that he can be this gentle to me

My hands dance down his body to his privates. As usual, he is soft and flaccid.

I push him down and straddle him. Sliding my body slowly against his till I reach his manhood. He is still limp. I look up at his grinning face.

Gently, I lick and kiss
Tickle and tease
Fondle and fondle
I took all of him into my mouth
Hoping the warmth will arouse the still limp member

All to no avail..

Daniel: * Smiling * You know it dosen't work that way for me..

He stood up and walk to his closet.

I close my eyes and pray
Hoping its the scarf
Hoping its the feather
Please don't let it be the cable tie

Its none of the above.

In his hands was a bundle of black rope.

Me: Huh? Again? What game again this time?
Daniel: Its a surprise..

I dread the word surprise
Every game of his has a surprise
And I always ended up screaming
Not for joy though

Me: If you want to tie me up you have to catch me first..

With that I dash out of his room and ran to the dining table.

Daniel: Ahh Kerri .. you want to play cat and mouse..

I laugh and attempt to run away from him but he is too quick for me. With one hand drape around my shoulders he scoop me in his arms and carried me to the bed.

I slip my hands firmly under my buttocks as he reach out for them.

Me: *pouts* Eh, I don't want to use that lah. Can? Please..

Without a word he pull out my hands and wound the rope on both my hands forming a complex knot. The rope despite its tough looking texture was surprisingly soft. Not your usual rope from the hardware shop. Later I learned it was some kind of silk rope used specially in kinbaku bondage.

Me: Wa.. when did you learn to tie like this?

Smiling down on me, he raise my bounded hands above my head and climb on top of me. Using his knees he spread my thighs apart.

He came close to me and touch his lips to mine. He did not kiss me. Looking into my eyes, he chew my lower lips. Just a gentle nibble. Slowly he move down to my neck, nibbling all the way to my soft mound. He slip a slippery tongue inside curling it in all directions. It was a heavenly sensation.

I cherish every single second of his uncanny gentleness. But there is a price to pay. For every second of bliss there was a second of pain to endure...

He was pushing my thighs far apart. My knees were just next to my breasts. Yes, iam that flexible..

I felt utterly obscene to open my legs that wide. So I attempted to bring them together.

Me: * Giggling * Waa.. Are you looking for gold? Open my legs so big for what..

I clamp my legs together squeezing his head out of my thighs.

He pry open my legs and I clamp them back together.
Frustrated, he stop pushing my legs and look at me.

Daniel: Open your legs
Me: Don't want.. you untie me first then I will open.. If not, its closed for the night..

I pout and look away.

He got up from the bed and came back with a long metal ruler. The metal ruler again. At least it wasn't the wooden dowel with the sharp end. Without any warning, he smack the metal ruler hard against my thigh.

Me: OUCH!! SHIT MAN DANIEL!! IT HURTS!!

Overwhelmed with anger, I clamp onto the ruler with my feet and fling it away.
The look on his face was thunderous
I flip to one side n curl into a fetal position
Laying still. Just an act of defiance to see what he can do to me
I just refuse to move
He prop me onto my knees and held my waist. I was now on all fours with my butt high in the air. There is something animalistic about this position. It reminded me of my ex neighbour's dog, Merlin the great dane. She used to stretch herself this way every morning.

I knew what was coming my way. Sigh
The thing with Daniel was that he was never fascinated with raw sex. That was where I find it weird as I always presume that all men loves the act of sex. The penetration. The act of copulation. The production of semen. But not Daniel. Very few of our altered romantic bonding sessions ended with any form of discharges.

Well, with the exception of blood.

With my butt high in the air, he turn around and lean against the soft folds of my butt cheeks. There are times where I will be lying on top of him (which I do not mind) or him on top of me and falling asleep in that manner.

After 15 minutes of being a butt furniture of sorts I collapse on the bed and kick him away.

Me: *Giggling* Wei, very shiok hor

He climb on top of me and cradle my head. I look up at his boyish face and into those soft black eyes.

Tell me why I love you so much..

Grabbing a fistful of my hair, he tilt my head back exposing my fair tender neck. We kiss passionately before he went down to my neck. I was lost in the throes of passion. Yeah, I could orgasmic just from nuzzling my neck.

It was all moonlight and roses, until he bite me on my shoulder.
A piercing pain that jolted me out of my heaven.

I do not mind him rough handling me
I do not mind him tying me
I do not mind him using me as a furniture prop
But i do mind when he bite me and drew blood. Its not so much of the pain that bothers me. It was the behaviour.

The look on his face was melancholic and yet mischievous.. and something I could not place a finger on.

A palpable sense of joy

He look happy when he was hurting me. And yet.. I thought I saw a shadow of agony in his eyes..

I could have walk away. Walk away from him.
But I did not.
Perhaps this is what they meant by "Love is blind"

Why are you like this Daniel?
Why?

The next few days I had to resort to wearing long sleeve shirts to cover up the bruises on my wrist.

The last straw came when one day he was kissing me and he bit me on my lips. It bled non stop.

furritales · #99 07-03-2014, 10:18 PM

1/4/11 Remember when (part 4)

The day we broke up is a day of screaming and shrieking amid tears.

Daniel: Kerri.. please don't leave.. I love you so much..

ME: PLEASE!! HURTING ME IS LOVING ME SO MUCH?!! DON'T BULLSHIT ME DANIEL.. IAM NOT A 3-YEAR-OLD!! IAM NOT STUPID!!!

Daniel: *In a quiet voice* Kerri, is there someone else in your life?

Me: NO!!! HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT?!!! HOW COULD YOU!! I WANT TO LEAVE YOU BECAUSE IAM JUST A SEX TOY TO YOU!!! ALL I WANT IS FOR YOU TO MAKE LOVE TO ME NOT TORTURE ME!!

Daniel: Don't shout Kerri..

He took a step towards me and I back off by 5 steps.

Me: DON'T TOUCH ME!

The look on his face mirrored the expression when he first learned of his grandmother's demise. Pure grief.

Daniel: You doubt my love for you?.. You don't trust me anymore?..

I walked away from him..
Because I know I will give in..
If i see him cry..
It will just break my heart..